I believe in reincarnation. I believe that the souls of those who have passed on can return. I don't believe in a Buddhist style reincarnation. In fact, I doubt if my views of reincarnation are shared by very many, if any, others.
There is a Jewish belief in reincarnation. Go ahead and research that if you would like. It isn't really popular and there is a lot of discussion and debate about exactly how it works. None of that really matters.
So what do I believe about reincarnation?
I don't believe in time, so souls can live a life time in the present, then a life time in the past and a life time in the future or at any time. A father can be reincarnated as his own son, a son can be reincarnated as his own father.
Why? Suppose a soul hasn't really made a choice between God and Chaos, yet the body dies. Some say God sends that soul to hell. I don't believe that. I think it is more likely that God gives those souls who are on the "fence" as many chances as they need to make a choice between Heaven and Hell.
Suppose a father, like mine, was an abusive jerk who treated his son like crap. Why wouldn't God send that same soul back to become the abused son? Suppose the son hates the father and can not forgive? What happens?
Suppose someone commits suicide, why wouldn't God send them back to relive their life over again?
What is a "soul connection" or a "soul mate"? It could be the same soul living two different lifetimes or it could be two lovers who have been reborn. It is a connection of love that transcends life and death. Ever felt an instant connection to someone? Ever felt "love at first sight"? Welcome to this connection between people.
So what does this mean for regular people? Nothing really, the purpose of life is still to choose between God and Chaos. If someone decides that they never have to decide they have chosen Chaos. If someone really chooses God they have no need to live any other lives and they go to judgment.
The rest of us continue to live, die and be reborn without any knowledge of our past lives except in dreams or these instant connections to other people.
It also means that if we fail to forgive others, we really might be failing to forgive ourselves. Think about that, could the person who hurt you and you share a soul at different points in that soul's development? If we demand revenge against someone, could we be demanding that we ourselves are punished?
When I realized that God gave us as many chances as we needed, almost like playing a video game, I felt less pressure to divorce myself from this world. That was a mistake. In fact, it makes it more important to divorce myself from this world. This helped me realize that this is very probably my last life. My last chance to focus on God.
This last dating fiasco I went through helped me to realize that I am still very much attached to this world when I should be attached to God.
That creates a problem for me, because it means I have to learn how to focus on God and God is teaching me to do that. Imagine that, God cares enough to teach me that the things, the people of this world, are unreliable, undependable. God wants me to focus my life on God, and God is doing everything possible to make that happen.
For me, the reality is that the only path from today into tomorrow and the future in eternity is through Christ.
Should Christians believe in Reincarnation? Yes, but, it is not important for salvation. Reincarnation does play a part in Christ's story though.
One of the prophesies fulfilled is the prophesy that Elijah, who was taken bodily into heaven, would return to make the way for the Messiah. Today Jewish people set a place for Elijah at passover to emphasize that Elijah has not returned.
In Luke 1:17 we are told that John the Baptist will go forth in the Spirit and Power of Elias. In Matthew 11 Christ tells us, in reference to John the Baptist, "this is Elias". In Matthew 17 Christ tells us "Elias is come already" in reference to John the Baptist. In Mark 9 Christ tells us that Elias is come, again in reference to John the Baptist. In John 1 though, John the Baptist is asked if is Elias and John denies being Elias, or more properly, Elijah.
What happened here is that Elijah was reborn as John the Baptist. This is how God chose to fulfill the prophesy.
Tuesday, March 04, 2014
Pseudo Christians
In Matthew 7 it is written:
Judge not, that ye be not judged.
2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?
4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye?
5 Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.
This is incredibly important because it tells us what not to do, even more so because in the same Chapter Christ warns us:
18 A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit.
19 Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.
20 Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.
21 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.
22 Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works?
23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.
24 Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:
So what is the fruit of Christianity today? When people who do not go to church, and even many that do, are asked "What is the first word that comes to mind when you hear the word 'Christian' ", do they respond with the word "forgiveness" or "love"?
What fruit is Christianity growing today?
Galatians 5:
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
24 And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.
Are these the fruits that are being harvested? Or is Christianity associated with judgment and condemnation?
Matthew 18:35
So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.
Christians are known for condemning far more than they are known for forgiveness or love. Why is that?
Christ said, in John 5:29-32:
"29 And shall come forth; they that have done good, unto the resurrection of life; and they that have done evil, unto the resurrection of damnation.
30 I can of mine own self do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgment is just; because I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me.
31 If I bear witness of myself, my witness is not true.
32 There is another that beareth witness of me; and I know that the witness which he witnesseth of me is true."
What does that mean? How does the Holy Ghost bear witness of Christ?
When I was young I didn't understand. Even after I was saved I didn't grasp what this meant. God blessed me with a couple of visions and I began to understand. Christ and I began a true relationship and I understood why Isaiah wrote in 53:3 that Christ was a man of sorrows acquainted with grief.
When someone speaks or writes with the Holy Spirit the Holy Spirit witnesses what is said or written to those who can hear and those who can see. Those whose hearts are set on using God's word to tell others what to do cannot see or hear the witness of the spirit because God hides the truth from them.
God hates a lying tongue:
Proverbs 6:
16 These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him:
17 A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
18 An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief,
19 A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.
Yet God will send a lying spirit out that will cause people to lie:
1 Kings 22:22
And the Lord said unto him, Wherewith? And he said, I will go forth, and I will be a lying spirit in the mouth of all his prophets. And he said, Thou shalt persuade him, and prevail also: go forth, and do so.
2 Chronicles 18:22
Now therefore, behold, the Lord hath put a lying spirit in the mouth of these thy prophets, and the Lord hath spoken evil against thee.
So why would God make people lie if God hates a lying tongue or a false witness that speaketh lies?
Why would God send Christ and the apostles to spread discord among the people, to challenge the way they worship and teach God's word if God hates those who soweth discord?
What does God hate more than lying or sowing discord?
Losing people to chaos, to eternal damnation.
It is said that God judges. It is also said that any who choose God will be forgiven and accepted into paradise. If people choose what does God judge?
God judges the choice we make. Did we sincerely and completely choose God? Did we pretend to be Christians because we wanted authority over others? Did we see Christianity as something we could use to further or own desires?
God sometimes has me witness to non-believers. Usually though I witness to people who want to believe, but, have been confused by the erroneous teachings of those who use Christianity to cast people down. Often God has me witness to stiff necked people who pretend Christianity. I doubt if God expects them to change. I don't know why God shows me what God does, or why God has me witness to them. Maybe they will change. I think it is more likely that at the end days God will say, "I sent someone to tell you to listen to the Holy Ghost, you ignored them and listened to other people. You set your heart against my word and placed your faith in the words of people."
Over and over Satan twists words. Like Christ, who can do nothing of himself, I tell people to ignore me and listen to the Holy Ghost. For this I am called a hypocrite. Like Christ I tell people to listen to God and ignore the words, ways and laws of people. For this I am rejected of man. These things I count to my benefit.
Matthew 12:30-32
King James Version (KJV)
30 He that is not with me is against me; and he that gathereth not with me scattereth abroad.
31 Wherefore I say unto you, All manner of sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven unto men: but the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men.
32 And whosoever speaketh a word against the Son of man, it shall be forgiven him: but whosoever speaketh against the Holy Ghost, it shall not be forgiven him, neither in this world, neither in the world to come.
I prayed once about the word against, and the words blasphemy in this context. If we check out the Greek word used as "against", there is no corresponding word in 12:31. The word is implied when translated into English from the Greek. The word against in 12:32 is the Greek word
κατά (G2596) and it actually means "according to, toward, along".
What does that mean?
Two people can witness exactly the same thing, both sound totally sincere, and one can be witnessing "along side" the Holy Spirit and the other can be witnessing the Holy Spirit directly.
God taught me that it is being with the Holy Spirit that is important. Just because people travel along the same road does not mean they are together. Some travel with the Holy Ghost and those who are with the Holy Ghost are with them. Those on the same road, yet not with the Holy Ghost, are actually working against the Holy Ghost, pushing people from the road of love into the chaos of condemnation.
This is why non-believers see Christians as judgmental and condemning when Christ actually teaches us not to judge or condemn.
It doesn't take many false witnesses to corrupt the vision Christ had for the Church. A few people traveling along the same road telling homosexuals or lesbians about the mote in their eyes while ignoring the plank in their own eyes does an amazing job of corrupting Christianity.
Condemning those who practice abortion, without regard to Exodus 21:22, as murders with a mote in their eye, while ignoring the plank in their own eyes helps paint Christianity as judgmental and condemning.
Is it worth throwing away the fruit of the spirit, love, compassion, gentleness, to be known as those who judge and condemn? Pseudo Christians think so.
The Holy Ghost will witness the truth of what I write, to those who are open to receive the Holy Ghost. To others my words will be as clanging symbols to be condemned as Christ was condemned.
Judge not, that ye be not judged.
2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?
4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye?
5 Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.
This is incredibly important because it tells us what not to do, even more so because in the same Chapter Christ warns us:
18 A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit.
19 Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.
20 Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.
21 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.
22 Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works?
23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.
24 Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:
So what is the fruit of Christianity today? When people who do not go to church, and even many that do, are asked "What is the first word that comes to mind when you hear the word 'Christian' ", do they respond with the word "forgiveness" or "love"?
What fruit is Christianity growing today?
Galatians 5:
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
24 And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.
Are these the fruits that are being harvested? Or is Christianity associated with judgment and condemnation?
Matthew 18:35
So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.
Christians are known for condemning far more than they are known for forgiveness or love. Why is that?
Christ said, in John 5:29-32:
"29 And shall come forth; they that have done good, unto the resurrection of life; and they that have done evil, unto the resurrection of damnation.
30 I can of mine own self do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgment is just; because I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me.
31 If I bear witness of myself, my witness is not true.
32 There is another that beareth witness of me; and I know that the witness which he witnesseth of me is true."
What does that mean? How does the Holy Ghost bear witness of Christ?
When I was young I didn't understand. Even after I was saved I didn't grasp what this meant. God blessed me with a couple of visions and I began to understand. Christ and I began a true relationship and I understood why Isaiah wrote in 53:3 that Christ was a man of sorrows acquainted with grief.
When someone speaks or writes with the Holy Spirit the Holy Spirit witnesses what is said or written to those who can hear and those who can see. Those whose hearts are set on using God's word to tell others what to do cannot see or hear the witness of the spirit because God hides the truth from them.
God hates a lying tongue:
Proverbs 6:
16 These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him:
17 A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
18 An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief,
19 A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.
Yet God will send a lying spirit out that will cause people to lie:
1 Kings 22:22
And the Lord said unto him, Wherewith? And he said, I will go forth, and I will be a lying spirit in the mouth of all his prophets. And he said, Thou shalt persuade him, and prevail also: go forth, and do so.
2 Chronicles 18:22
Now therefore, behold, the Lord hath put a lying spirit in the mouth of these thy prophets, and the Lord hath spoken evil against thee.
So why would God make people lie if God hates a lying tongue or a false witness that speaketh lies?
Why would God send Christ and the apostles to spread discord among the people, to challenge the way they worship and teach God's word if God hates those who soweth discord?
What does God hate more than lying or sowing discord?
Losing people to chaos, to eternal damnation.
It is said that God judges. It is also said that any who choose God will be forgiven and accepted into paradise. If people choose what does God judge?
God judges the choice we make. Did we sincerely and completely choose God? Did we pretend to be Christians because we wanted authority over others? Did we see Christianity as something we could use to further or own desires?
God sometimes has me witness to non-believers. Usually though I witness to people who want to believe, but, have been confused by the erroneous teachings of those who use Christianity to cast people down. Often God has me witness to stiff necked people who pretend Christianity. I doubt if God expects them to change. I don't know why God shows me what God does, or why God has me witness to them. Maybe they will change. I think it is more likely that at the end days God will say, "I sent someone to tell you to listen to the Holy Ghost, you ignored them and listened to other people. You set your heart against my word and placed your faith in the words of people."
Over and over Satan twists words. Like Christ, who can do nothing of himself, I tell people to ignore me and listen to the Holy Ghost. For this I am called a hypocrite. Like Christ I tell people to listen to God and ignore the words, ways and laws of people. For this I am rejected of man. These things I count to my benefit.
Matthew 12:30-32
King James Version (KJV)
30 He that is not with me is against me; and he that gathereth not with me scattereth abroad.
31 Wherefore I say unto you, All manner of sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven unto men: but the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men.
32 And whosoever speaketh a word against the Son of man, it shall be forgiven him: but whosoever speaketh against the Holy Ghost, it shall not be forgiven him, neither in this world, neither in the world to come.
I prayed once about the word against, and the words blasphemy in this context. If we check out the Greek word used as "against", there is no corresponding word in 12:31. The word is implied when translated into English from the Greek. The word against in 12:32 is the Greek word
κατά (G2596) and it actually means "according to, toward, along".
What does that mean?
Two people can witness exactly the same thing, both sound totally sincere, and one can be witnessing "along side" the Holy Spirit and the other can be witnessing the Holy Spirit directly.
God taught me that it is being with the Holy Spirit that is important. Just because people travel along the same road does not mean they are together. Some travel with the Holy Ghost and those who are with the Holy Ghost are with them. Those on the same road, yet not with the Holy Ghost, are actually working against the Holy Ghost, pushing people from the road of love into the chaos of condemnation.
This is why non-believers see Christians as judgmental and condemning when Christ actually teaches us not to judge or condemn.
It doesn't take many false witnesses to corrupt the vision Christ had for the Church. A few people traveling along the same road telling homosexuals or lesbians about the mote in their eyes while ignoring the plank in their own eyes does an amazing job of corrupting Christianity.
Condemning those who practice abortion, without regard to Exodus 21:22, as murders with a mote in their eye, while ignoring the plank in their own eyes helps paint Christianity as judgmental and condemning.
Is it worth throwing away the fruit of the spirit, love, compassion, gentleness, to be known as those who judge and condemn? Pseudo Christians think so.
The Holy Ghost will witness the truth of what I write, to those who are open to receive the Holy Ghost. To others my words will be as clanging symbols to be condemned as Christ was condemned.
Monday, March 03, 2014
"Christians" and grieving
Okay, so this dating fiasco I went through showed me I have a ways to go to deal with my grief and I have been trying.
I had a discussion with a “Director of Christian Ministry” on line today. I posted on-line that I ran into a psychologist and I was discussing grief with her so she suggested a book called “ZEN and the Art of Happiness”. I read the book and the basic theme is: “What ever happens is the best possible thing that can happen”. This is not something that helps people in grief. In fact, it is one of the top ten things you shouldn't say to grieving people.
So this "Christian" guy posts, “If they had a relationship with Christ while here on earth, then physical death is the best thing that could have happened to them.”
Here is a list of stuff not to say to people who are grieving:
http://www.connect.legacy.com/profiles/blogs/top-ten-list-what-not-to-say-to-the-bereaved
Number 3 is, “It's better this way” and Number 6 is, “It's God's will”.
How does anyone with a compassionate bone in their body say this stuff. No idea, but, people do. I have had people say all these things to me. This was particularly annoying because this is someone actually being paid to minister. Imagine, paying someone to say this insensitive stuff.
This is a perfect example of unchristian behavior and a perfect example of the way some self proclaimed "Christians" alienate those who are seeking. When "Christians" behave this way it destroys credibility.
What are Christians supposed to do? Witness the Good News of the Forgiveness of Sin through Christ.
I had a discussion with a “Director of Christian Ministry” on line today. I posted on-line that I ran into a psychologist and I was discussing grief with her so she suggested a book called “ZEN and the Art of Happiness”. I read the book and the basic theme is: “What ever happens is the best possible thing that can happen”. This is not something that helps people in grief. In fact, it is one of the top ten things you shouldn't say to grieving people.
So this "Christian" guy posts, “If they had a relationship with Christ while here on earth, then physical death is the best thing that could have happened to them.”
Here is a list of stuff not to say to people who are grieving:
http://www.connect.legacy.com/profiles/blogs/top-ten-list-what-not-to-say-to-the-bereaved
Number 3 is, “It's better this way” and Number 6 is, “It's God's will”.
How does anyone with a compassionate bone in their body say this stuff. No idea, but, people do. I have had people say all these things to me. This was particularly annoying because this is someone actually being paid to minister. Imagine, paying someone to say this insensitive stuff.
This is a perfect example of unchristian behavior and a perfect example of the way some self proclaimed "Christians" alienate those who are seeking. When "Christians" behave this way it destroys credibility.
What are Christians supposed to do? Witness the Good News of the Forgiveness of Sin through Christ.
What do Pseudo-Christians do? Witness about anything other than the Good News. A few weeks ago I was having lunch with a friend who is gay and he told me that he really appreciated the fact that I am accepting of people and I don't spend all my time telling him he has to change or he will go to hell.
I explained that only sinners ended up in Heaven and I didn't see how his sins were any worse than those who judge others, in direct opposition to Christ's commandment, "Judge Not..." In fact, I think gays are much more likely to get into Heaven than most self proclaimed "Christians" because a gay person is aware that they are committing a sin and a judgmental "Christian" believes they are righteous.
John D. Ayer
I was talking to a psychologist the
other day about grieving and she suggested a book. I bought the book
and read it.
Overall theme of the book: Tell
yourself that everything that happens is the very best thing that can
happen.
Think about that for a second. Who in
their right mind tells someone grieving, someone who lost a son and a
wife and a mother that it was the very best thing that could have
happened?
Definitely need a sign for that
psychologist.
Unlike · · Share · March 1 at 3:25pm
·
DofCM If they had a relationship
with Christ while here on earth, then physical death is the best
thing that could have happened to them.
3 hours ago · Like
John D. Ayer I hope you never have an opportunity to be tested on believing that losing your wife or child is the best thing that could have happened.
3 hours ago · Like
DofCM It seems you are only looking at this from your perspective. There are other things to consider. What if it was part of God's plan for them to leave this earth? I would also like to know exactly what the person meant by their deaths being "the best thing that could have happened."
2 hours ago · Like
DofCM I also assume that the circumstances surrounding someones death would dictate how someone feels about it
2 hours ago · Like
John D. Ayer Go read the book, ZEN and the art of hapiness.
The premise is actually a very good one and I used a similar meditation theme prior to the death of my son, my meditation theme was, "This is the best moment of my life because it is the moment I am now living." Later, when I became a Christian again I added "God made this moment and it is the best moment of my life because it is the moment I am living right now".
Jim, if you ever need to counsel someone who lost a child or a spouse I suggest you do not try and convince them that it was the best thing that could have happened to them. Take it from me, that is not a good direction to take.
2 hours ago · Like
John D. Ayer In fact, the best witness that I have about loss is comparing it to an amputation. Losing someone we love is like an amputation. We never get over it, or even past it, we just learn to live without that missing piece of us. It takes time and people learn at different rates.
2 hours ago · Like
DofCM I hope whoever you are seeing is a Christian, and practices from a scriptural foundation. Also, you are going to have to try harder to convince me that leaving this earth to be with my creator is not the best thing that could happen to me. I encourage you to above all seek God's comfort and guidence in your life no matter what situation you are in.
2 hours ago · Like
John D. Ayer Jim, Believe me, you don't want to encourage God to test your resolve on this issue.
2 hours ago · Like
John D. Ayer I can't loan that book, but, I can loan you my kindle with the book on it if you would like to read it. It isn't a bad book, just not a book for someone dealing with grief.
2 hours ago · Like
DofCM Im not asking God to test me in this area, but I know that I trust in the one who created me and know what awaits those who believe in Christ when they die!!!
2 hours ago · Like
DofCM Is it a secular book or rooted in scripture?
2 hours ago · Like
DofCM I dont have a kindle. I just recently got into the smart phone era!! lol
2 hours ago · Like
John D. Ayer It is a secular book about ZEN, which is a way of behavior that focuses the mind on the present moment rather than the past or the future. Most practitioners of ZEN are Buddhists, but, ZEN itself is not a religion.
about an hour ago · Like
DofCM Im familiar with zen. I was curious if it was being presented with Christian believes or not
about an hour ago · Like
John D. Ayer Jim, until you have suffered the devastating loss of a spouse or a child I suggest that you don't tell people who have lost their children or their spouse that it is a good thing.
No, the book is not focused on Christ, but then, a lot of books that claim to be Christian don't focus on Christ either. A lot of books focus on people's interpretation of scripture rather than scripture.
I like ZEN because it is consistent with Christ's teaching about focusing on the moment and not worrying about the future.
about an hour ago · Like
DofCM So you are saying that unless i have personally experienced something, i am not qualified to speak on it? Why do you assume i havent lost a loved one. Again i will say, there is no better place to be then with our creator and redeemer. I am not sure why you disagree with that.
about an hour ago · Like
DofCM I tend to stay away from books that are not somehow Biblical. Unless i am researching something specific
about an hour ago · Like
John D. Ayer No, Jim, again you are twisting my words. I suggested that until you have suffered a devastating, such as a spouse or a child, loss you shouldn't tell people who have that it is a good thing.
You are welcome to twist my words
any way you like, but, I don't see how that helps either of us.
about an hour ago · Like
John D. Ayer 2nd Timothy 3:16 tells us all scripture (the Greek actually translates as writing, not necessarily only writing pertaining to God. The way the word scripture was used in the 15th century is consistent with the Greek and inconsistent with how we use it today) is good for education.
about an hour ago · Like
DofCM What words did i twist?
about an hour ago · Like
John D. Ayer I said:
Jim, until you have suffered the
devastating loss of a spouse or a child I suggest that you don't tell
people who have lost their children or their spouse that it is a good
thing.
No, the book is not focused on
Christ, but then, a lot of books that claim to be Christian don't
focus on Christ either. A lot of books focus on people's
interpretation of scripture rather than scripture.
I like ZEN because it is
consistent with Christ's teaching about focusing on the moment and
not worrying about the future.
about an hour ago · Like
DofCM I would you encourage you to further study the context of that passage, as paul was not referring to all writings
about an hour ago · Like
DofCM So what was your intent when you gave me that siggestion?
about an hour ago · Like
John D. Ayer Really, I suggest that you go read it, because, in fact, he was. The passage above, 3:15, specifies "Holy Scripture" while 3:16 is more generic on the subject. Were your assumption to be correct the writer would have specified "Holy Scripture" a second time.
about an hour ago · Unlike · 1
John D. Ayer My intent was to suggest that until you have suffered the loss of a child or a spouse that you not tell people who have that it was for the best.
Even if you do suffer such a loss
making that statement to someone who has might still get you into
trouble, but, at least then you would have had the experience which
gives your statement credibility.
about an hour ago · Like
DofCM Thats an incorrect assumption. He didnt need to be redundant. He was continuing his thought from the previous passage
about an hour ago · Like
DofCM Dont see how telling someone the truth would get me in trouble, atleast not with God, which is what matters
about an hour ago · Like
JHFW I rejoice knowing my son is with God but I grieve losing him and the hurt is as real today as it was June 8, 2013.
about an hour ago · Unlike · 2
DofCM So are you equating experience with credibility?
about an hour ago · Like
John D. Ayer God will decide what truth is Jim and God's ways are beyond the thoughts of people.
Yes, experience gives people
credibility. The Holy Ghost brings their own credibility and
witnesses to those whose eyes can see and whose ears can hear when
someone speaks from the spirit.
about an hour ago · Like
John D. Ayer Jim, not once have you said anything like what Jane wrote. no backpedaling here and pretending you were saying something different.
about an hour ago · Like
John D. Ayer What you have said, over and over, is that death is the best thing that can happen to someone who has a relationship with Christ. Not once have you validated any grief response. What you said was that the circumstances of a death influences how people feel about it.
about an hour ago · Like
John D. Ayer FYI Jane, I think the Holy Ghost prompted your post and I don't believe the Holy Ghost has prompted any of Jim's posts.
58 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer By the way, go study the Greek for 2Timothy 3:15-16. It might surprise you to know that there were two different Greek words used, G1121 and G1124. Go study before speaking without the spirit and from your own understanding.
49 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer
Jim, you wrote:
"If they had a relationship
with Christ while here on earth, then physical death is the best
thing that could have happened to them."
" It seems you are only
looking at this from your perspective. There are other things to
consider. What if it was part of God's plan for them to leave this
earth?"
How does that, in any way, shape or
form, come anywhere near what Jane wrote?
John D. Ayer http://www.connect.legacy.com/.../top-ten-list-what-not...
Top 10 Things Not to Say to the Bereaved
www.connect.legacy.com
Q. During a recent funeral, I overheard someone tell the adopted son of the dece...See More
27 minutes ago · Like · Remove Preview
DofCM This will be my last post...john, i pray that God continues to show his love to you and that you find complete comfort in Him alone
25 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer Jim, I appreciate your prayers. Your inaccurate reading of scripture and your completely insensitive comments were forgiven by me as soon as you made them.
I hope God finds a gentle way to teach you sensitivity for those who grieve because you are seriously lacking compassion.
19 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer I posted this exchange on my blog because it is a perfect example of unchristian behavior and a perfect example of what people who represent themselves as Christian do to alienate those who are seeking.
17 minutes ago · Like
DofCM What happened to your posts john?
8 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer What posts?
5 minutes ago · Like
DofCM nevermind, im still learning to use my "smartphone"
2 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer No prob.
2 minutes ago · Like
Addendum:
If you are interested in 2nd Timothy 3:15-16 the words used are http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%CE%B3%CF%81%CE%B1%CF%86%CE%AE in 3:16
and then in 3:15 two different words are used to denote Holy Scripture,
Holy translated from: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E1%BC%B1%CE%B5%CF%81%CF%8C%CF%82
Scripture translated from: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%CE%B3%CF%81%CE%AC%CE%BC%CE%BC%CE%B1
Once someone studies and prays it become obvious that the subject matter changes between the two verses.
Addendum 2:
Notice that throughout our conversation I never disagreed with DofCM, I just pointed out that it would be a bad idea to tell people who have suffered a devastating loss that it is a good thing.
DofCM insists, "Also, you are going to have to try harder to convince me that leaving this earth to be with my creator is not the best thing that could happen to me." This is just twisting my words, and this is a common method Satan uses.
DofCM insists, "Again i will say, there is no better place to be then with our creator and redeemer. I am not sure why you disagree with that." again with the word twisting, I never said any such thing. This is just false witness. I never disagreed.
This is a perfect example of unChristian behavior. In the statements by DofCM there is no compassion or sensitivity, there is misquoting of scripture by someone guided by their own understanding, there is false witness and twisting of the words of others.
John D. Ayer http://www.connect.legacy.com/.../top-ten-list-what-not...
Top 10 Things Not to Say to the Bereaved
www.connect.legacy.com
Q. During a recent funeral, I overheard someone tell the adopted son of the dece...See More
27 minutes ago · Like · Remove Preview
DofCM This will be my last post...john, i pray that God continues to show his love to you and that you find complete comfort in Him alone
25 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer Jim, I appreciate your prayers. Your inaccurate reading of scripture and your completely insensitive comments were forgiven by me as soon as you made them.
I hope God finds a gentle way to teach you sensitivity for those who grieve because you are seriously lacking compassion.
19 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer I posted this exchange on my blog because it is a perfect example of unchristian behavior and a perfect example of what people who represent themselves as Christian do to alienate those who are seeking.
17 minutes ago · Like
DofCM What happened to your posts john?
8 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer What posts?
5 minutes ago · Like
DofCM nevermind, im still learning to use my "smartphone"
2 minutes ago · Like
John D. Ayer No prob.
2 minutes ago · Like
Addendum:
If you are interested in 2nd Timothy 3:15-16 the words used are http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%CE%B3%CF%81%CE%B1%CF%86%CE%AE in 3:16
and then in 3:15 two different words are used to denote Holy Scripture,
Holy translated from: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E1%BC%B1%CE%B5%CF%81%CF%8C%CF%82
Scripture translated from: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%CE%B3%CF%81%CE%AC%CE%BC%CE%BC%CE%B1
Once someone studies and prays it become obvious that the subject matter changes between the two verses.
Addendum 2:
Notice that throughout our conversation I never disagreed with DofCM, I just pointed out that it would be a bad idea to tell people who have suffered a devastating loss that it is a good thing.
DofCM insists, "Also, you are going to have to try harder to convince me that leaving this earth to be with my creator is not the best thing that could happen to me." This is just twisting my words, and this is a common method Satan uses.
DofCM insists, "Again i will say, there is no better place to be then with our creator and redeemer. I am not sure why you disagree with that." again with the word twisting, I never said any such thing. This is just false witness. I never disagreed.
This is a perfect example of unChristian behavior. In the statements by DofCM there is no compassion or sensitivity, there is misquoting of scripture by someone guided by their own understanding, there is false witness and twisting of the words of others.
Friday, February 28, 2014
Divorce and Death and Dating
I've been thinking about my divorce, final back in 1989. My ex and I had an argument, nothing new, five years married and we spent 2, maybe 2 1/2 years together. She always wanted to fight. I would go to leave and she would attack me, usually with a weapon. This last argument, I split for a few days. She moved out of the house and took everything. Even my photo albums, pictures of my grand parents, everything.
I decided, what the hell, I cleaned up the house and rented it out. Then I moved in with my mother until I could find someplace else. My ex flipped out and dropped the kids off with my mother one day when I was at work. I guess she expected me to chase her down and ask her to move back, Really?
Okay, I had physical custody. Now what? To make a long story short she filed for divorce, tried to convince the court I had kidnapped the kids from her, made up a bunch of lies and then she and her boy friend got ripped off on a drug deal so they fire bombed a house. The wrong house and they killed two old women.
Theoretically, if the cops end up letting someone go because of insufficient evidence it isn't supposed to count against the arrested person in a custody battle. Realistically, if you murder someone in the middle of a custody battle you have pretty much lost.
My ex was a psycho, but, in a lot of ways she had a really good heart. We threw a Christmas party for my family and she made custom Christmas stockings for everyone, the Jewish people had Menorahs and Stars of David and stuff. It was a blast. She could be really great, sometimes. Other times she was as psycho as she was nice. Bi Polar maybe? Who knows, she was a total psycho, but, sometimes she could be really great.
Fast forward to 1994 and the kids want to go live with their mother. That is another long story, with a bad ending because I let them and my son ended up dead.
Through all that I worked hard at going from drop-out to machinist to tool maker to engineer. Then I got sick, my heart crapped out.
Lots of baggage and I thought I was dealing with it okay, did some grief counseling, going back to school, etc.
The woman I was dating recently really did a number on me. I am really vulnerable between the day my son died and his birthday, essentially the month of January. I don't usually go out New Years because he died on the 29th. This year I did and I had a pretty good time, even if I was dying inside. I always am around that time of year and I need to deal better with his death.
As psycho as my ex-wife was, she wouldn't have hurt me the way this last woman did. She may have wanted to, but, my ex would never have, never did, rip my heart out the way this last woman did. My ex can be pretty ruthless, but, more in a physical way (we share that trait), causing people emotional pain for pleasure is just wacked.
So, am I really ready to date? No. I screwed up.
But it taught me a lot and I am always happy to learn. I learned I have a lot more to deal with over the death of my son, my wife and even some others like my mother. I have to learn to deal with the loss of a career I worked hard at. Lots of loss and I really suck at dealing with loss. You'd think by now I would be an expert, but, I'm not.
I'm good at keeping going when everyone else quits. I will keep working on something, "beating a dog to death" until I make it work. Not a real dog, a figurative "dog" of a project. So I end up being credited with doing things people have failed at, the "impossible". Only, I can't do that any more.
So, here I am. Not getting any affirmation from women. Not getting any affirmation from work. School is cool, but, it is kind of boring. It drags...goes so s l o w...
In fact I am not getting any affirmation from anywhere, except God. God is doing some very cool things that have really made my life better. Recently I had a small windfall where I bought some new hiking boots and gave some money to the church so the youth group could go to a Christian concert. The concert was kewl, but, only three youth and fifteen adults went. I paid for a bunch of adults who have more money than I do. Good trails are a ways away and I couldn't afford the gas to go, but, got another small windfall and spent some gas money driving out to the Poto today. Good walk.
Now, I know no one really dies. I don't mean I think, I mean I really KNOW that no one really dies so my son and my wife and my mother and everyone else is okay. So why am I so freaking sad about all that? Selfishness? No idea. I don't get it. I don't understand where the tears come from, or why I miss Billy and Lisa and my mom so much. It makes no sense to me.
But, this is what I know. I need to learn how to deal with this emotional grief schtuff way the frick better. If I hadn't been so vulnerable, ms. "I love you but you made a snide remark", would never have gotten to me. Especially since I knew she was lying and cheating. I mean, WTF is wrong with me that I go off the deep end for someone I know is lying?
Stupid.
I wouldn't even have sex with this woman, I used to let my little head do the thinking and I didn't this time and got burned. WTF.
I need about a hundred hits of mesc, a motorcycle and around 5K for a road trip. By the time I got home in a month I would be so burned out that it wouldn't matter what had happened because my brain would be so scrambled I wouldn't care anyway. By the time I recovered and got straight I would be beyond caring.
But, I ain't doing squat where I can pick up enough benjamins for all that and even if I was I probably wouldn't. Probably. Besides, what would I do with the dog? It would be dangerous to take him riding on a motorcycle while I'm on mescaline. It would be so nice cruising down south though....coping trails from all the lights....totally happy no matter what. LSD would be better if I could get some without the strychnine...
Never had a bad trip, would I with all this grief crap?
So, stoned out road trip is out of the question. I just got to suck it up and get on with life...except for the whole grief thing. I tried the "suck it up" bit. It has been 15 years. WTF? Still dealing, or not dealing, with it. So what is the next step?
No clue, but, I can never be thankful enough to God for bringing the narcissist into my life to make me realize how F'd up I really am right now. The one thing I am sure of is that now that I realize how F'd up I am over all this death crap God can work with me to straighten it out.
God is good, even when life isn't.
I decided, what the hell, I cleaned up the house and rented it out. Then I moved in with my mother until I could find someplace else. My ex flipped out and dropped the kids off with my mother one day when I was at work. I guess she expected me to chase her down and ask her to move back, Really?
Okay, I had physical custody. Now what? To make a long story short she filed for divorce, tried to convince the court I had kidnapped the kids from her, made up a bunch of lies and then she and her boy friend got ripped off on a drug deal so they fire bombed a house. The wrong house and they killed two old women.
Theoretically, if the cops end up letting someone go because of insufficient evidence it isn't supposed to count against the arrested person in a custody battle. Realistically, if you murder someone in the middle of a custody battle you have pretty much lost.
My ex was a psycho, but, in a lot of ways she had a really good heart. We threw a Christmas party for my family and she made custom Christmas stockings for everyone, the Jewish people had Menorahs and Stars of David and stuff. It was a blast. She could be really great, sometimes. Other times she was as psycho as she was nice. Bi Polar maybe? Who knows, she was a total psycho, but, sometimes she could be really great.
Fast forward to 1994 and the kids want to go live with their mother. That is another long story, with a bad ending because I let them and my son ended up dead.
Through all that I worked hard at going from drop-out to machinist to tool maker to engineer. Then I got sick, my heart crapped out.
Lots of baggage and I thought I was dealing with it okay, did some grief counseling, going back to school, etc.
The woman I was dating recently really did a number on me. I am really vulnerable between the day my son died and his birthday, essentially the month of January. I don't usually go out New Years because he died on the 29th. This year I did and I had a pretty good time, even if I was dying inside. I always am around that time of year and I need to deal better with his death.
As psycho as my ex-wife was, she wouldn't have hurt me the way this last woman did. She may have wanted to, but, my ex would never have, never did, rip my heart out the way this last woman did. My ex can be pretty ruthless, but, more in a physical way (we share that trait), causing people emotional pain for pleasure is just wacked.
So, am I really ready to date? No. I screwed up.
But it taught me a lot and I am always happy to learn. I learned I have a lot more to deal with over the death of my son, my wife and even some others like my mother. I have to learn to deal with the loss of a career I worked hard at. Lots of loss and I really suck at dealing with loss. You'd think by now I would be an expert, but, I'm not.
I'm good at keeping going when everyone else quits. I will keep working on something, "beating a dog to death" until I make it work. Not a real dog, a figurative "dog" of a project. So I end up being credited with doing things people have failed at, the "impossible". Only, I can't do that any more.
So, here I am. Not getting any affirmation from women. Not getting any affirmation from work. School is cool, but, it is kind of boring. It drags...goes so s l o w...
In fact I am not getting any affirmation from anywhere, except God. God is doing some very cool things that have really made my life better. Recently I had a small windfall where I bought some new hiking boots and gave some money to the church so the youth group could go to a Christian concert. The concert was kewl, but, only three youth and fifteen adults went. I paid for a bunch of adults who have more money than I do. Good trails are a ways away and I couldn't afford the gas to go, but, got another small windfall and spent some gas money driving out to the Poto today. Good walk.
Now, I know no one really dies. I don't mean I think, I mean I really KNOW that no one really dies so my son and my wife and my mother and everyone else is okay. So why am I so freaking sad about all that? Selfishness? No idea. I don't get it. I don't understand where the tears come from, or why I miss Billy and Lisa and my mom so much. It makes no sense to me.
But, this is what I know. I need to learn how to deal with this emotional grief schtuff way the frick better. If I hadn't been so vulnerable, ms. "I love you but you made a snide remark", would never have gotten to me. Especially since I knew she was lying and cheating. I mean, WTF is wrong with me that I go off the deep end for someone I know is lying?
Stupid.
I wouldn't even have sex with this woman, I used to let my little head do the thinking and I didn't this time and got burned. WTF.
I need about a hundred hits of mesc, a motorcycle and around 5K for a road trip. By the time I got home in a month I would be so burned out that it wouldn't matter what had happened because my brain would be so scrambled I wouldn't care anyway. By the time I recovered and got straight I would be beyond caring.
But, I ain't doing squat where I can pick up enough benjamins for all that and even if I was I probably wouldn't. Probably. Besides, what would I do with the dog? It would be dangerous to take him riding on a motorcycle while I'm on mescaline. It would be so nice cruising down south though....coping trails from all the lights....totally happy no matter what. LSD would be better if I could get some without the strychnine...
Never had a bad trip, would I with all this grief crap?
So, stoned out road trip is out of the question. I just got to suck it up and get on with life...except for the whole grief thing. I tried the "suck it up" bit. It has been 15 years. WTF? Still dealing, or not dealing, with it. So what is the next step?
No clue, but, I can never be thankful enough to God for bringing the narcissist into my life to make me realize how F'd up I really am right now. The one thing I am sure of is that now that I realize how F'd up I am over all this death crap God can work with me to straighten it out.
God is good, even when life isn't.
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
Lost Love and Making Life Better
So here it is in February and I know I made the best decision in my life not allowing the woman I was dating to spend the anniversary of my son's death with me. (last blog back in Dec '13, http://jdayer.blogspot.com/2013/12/dealing-with-shit-and-love.html ) She broke up with me the day after my dead son's birthday.
Dealing with emotional crap is difficult, but, not dealing with it is even worse. I made a bad choice dating her, but, that ends up being a good choice for me because I always learn more from the worst mistakes than I do from the minor ones. Lets just say that this was an awesome lesson and I am really thankful that I learned it.
She wasn't being honest with me. She was surfing a dating site while she was dating me and she was constantly breaking dates. She was rarely available on a Friday or a Saturday and never on both in a row. She had specifically told me that she had used this dating site and had hidden her profile because she considered me her exclusive boyfriend and she told me that she loved me.
Okay, after about 4 broken dates I checked the site and there was her profile and a message saying the last time she was on was that day. This was about 3 weeks before she dumped me. It isn't like I am a jealous guy, we only dated a couple months. The fact that I never asked her to be exclusive to me and then she lied about it bugged the crap out of me though.
I don't confront people, never tell people what you know. This is a "God Father" piece of wisdom I have believed for a long time. Drag out the DVD, Brando tells James Cann, "never tell anyone outside the family what you are thinking!"
Anyhow, I tried to work stuff out, but, when she dumped me I confronted her. She lied her ass off, of course. I told her she made the right choice in breaking up with me. I meant that and mean it today. I messaged the crap out of her using that dating site, after blocking her so she couldn't reply. She could have blocked me, or uninstalled the app from her phone, but, she didn't. I figured it was the best way to make sure she never tried to work things out with me. Sure, I had her phone number (I deleted it off my phone, but, bills are often handy for something :-) and I am sure I could track down her e-mail, but, why? I just focused on the thing she lied about and used to cheat on me with.
Before I blocked her from sending me messages she actually tried to tell me that she still loved me and the only reason she broke up with me was because I made a snide remark when she broke date number 8, a Saturday night. Can you imagine loving someone and then dumping them because they made a single snide remark? Yeah, me neither.
I am enormously glad I didn't have intercourse with her. Okay, so we did just about everything but have intercourse. There is something really hot about watching a woman on her knees in a mirror......anyway, probably went a little too far there. I should have kept my pants on. I think my refusal to have actual intercourse probably contributed to her dumping me, and that is a good thing. Still, one night we spent about 4 hours doing nothing but "foreplay" and that was amazingly fun. I will do that again if I can find another woman willing to spend 4 hours teasing each other to death.
It was an amazing learning experience and I think my vulnerability around this time of year really made it important to me. As weird as this sounds, it makes me want to be more open to being hurt rather than more closed off.
One of the biggest lessons I learned was to stop depending on my own judgment about women. I know I can't trust myself anymore. I am going to focus on depending on God. Terrific lesson to learn. And FYI, the word fornication in the New Testament is translated from the word Pornia, which is the root word for Pornography and at the time the New Testament was written actually meant Temple Prostitution. Where the New Testament tells us not to fornicate it is actually telling us not to engage in pagan fertility rites. I guarantee I am not engaging in any sexually oriented worship to pagan gods.
Really, the only reason I didn't have actual intercourse is because I didn't want that close an emotional attachment with someone I thought I was probably going to break up with.
I think God guided my choice not to spend the anniversary of my son's death with her. I know I prayed a lot about it and I know I made the right choice.
In the end, pain is a great teacher and to be a great student I think we need to be as open to being hurt as we can be.
Dealing with emotional crap is difficult, but, not dealing with it is even worse. I made a bad choice dating her, but, that ends up being a good choice for me because I always learn more from the worst mistakes than I do from the minor ones. Lets just say that this was an awesome lesson and I am really thankful that I learned it.
She wasn't being honest with me. She was surfing a dating site while she was dating me and she was constantly breaking dates. She was rarely available on a Friday or a Saturday and never on both in a row. She had specifically told me that she had used this dating site and had hidden her profile because she considered me her exclusive boyfriend and she told me that she loved me.
Okay, after about 4 broken dates I checked the site and there was her profile and a message saying the last time she was on was that day. This was about 3 weeks before she dumped me. It isn't like I am a jealous guy, we only dated a couple months. The fact that I never asked her to be exclusive to me and then she lied about it bugged the crap out of me though.
I don't confront people, never tell people what you know. This is a "God Father" piece of wisdom I have believed for a long time. Drag out the DVD, Brando tells James Cann, "never tell anyone outside the family what you are thinking!"
Anyhow, I tried to work stuff out, but, when she dumped me I confronted her. She lied her ass off, of course. I told her she made the right choice in breaking up with me. I meant that and mean it today. I messaged the crap out of her using that dating site, after blocking her so she couldn't reply. She could have blocked me, or uninstalled the app from her phone, but, she didn't. I figured it was the best way to make sure she never tried to work things out with me. Sure, I had her phone number (I deleted it off my phone, but, bills are often handy for something :-) and I am sure I could track down her e-mail, but, why? I just focused on the thing she lied about and used to cheat on me with.
Before I blocked her from sending me messages she actually tried to tell me that she still loved me and the only reason she broke up with me was because I made a snide remark when she broke date number 8, a Saturday night. Can you imagine loving someone and then dumping them because they made a single snide remark? Yeah, me neither.
I am enormously glad I didn't have intercourse with her. Okay, so we did just about everything but have intercourse. There is something really hot about watching a woman on her knees in a mirror......anyway, probably went a little too far there. I should have kept my pants on. I think my refusal to have actual intercourse probably contributed to her dumping me, and that is a good thing. Still, one night we spent about 4 hours doing nothing but "foreplay" and that was amazingly fun. I will do that again if I can find another woman willing to spend 4 hours teasing each other to death.
It was an amazing learning experience and I think my vulnerability around this time of year really made it important to me. As weird as this sounds, it makes me want to be more open to being hurt rather than more closed off.
One of the biggest lessons I learned was to stop depending on my own judgment about women. I know I can't trust myself anymore. I am going to focus on depending on God. Terrific lesson to learn. And FYI, the word fornication in the New Testament is translated from the word Pornia, which is the root word for Pornography and at the time the New Testament was written actually meant Temple Prostitution. Where the New Testament tells us not to fornicate it is actually telling us not to engage in pagan fertility rites. I guarantee I am not engaging in any sexually oriented worship to pagan gods.
Really, the only reason I didn't have actual intercourse is because I didn't want that close an emotional attachment with someone I thought I was probably going to break up with.
I think God guided my choice not to spend the anniversary of my son's death with her. I know I prayed a lot about it and I know I made the right choice.
In the end, pain is a great teacher and to be a great student I think we need to be as open to being hurt as we can be.
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